Abbie Road.

Just realized my family knows nothing about me.

It was the first stand up show I had ever been to.

Of course, I laughed uncontrollably most of the night.

However, something odd happened when I left. I felt this empty feeling. A this wasn’t worth it sort of feeling.

I don’t know if it had anything to do with the amount of dirty jokes and that I sat beside my mother or if seeing him at the taping of his show made the second less exciting.

My third idea is probably the least likely. I simply feel like I have become more cynical in the past year. Or maybe more analytical. Either way, I can no longer just laugh at something. I have to think about why I find it funny and why others find it funny.

I catch myself only really laughing at the political or historical jokes.

I consider wording and attempt to decider a joke’s origin.

I think.

And I do it far too often.

I just got one of those what am I doing with my life sort of feelings.

How am I making the world better by what I do?

How WILL I make the world better by what I WANT to do?

Am I selfish for wanting a career that I enjoy and that may not positively or greatly impact the world?

I go over these questions all the time.

The only problem is this time I am having a hard time coming up with answers.

Not the princess. 

No, I’m the creepy neighbor Mr. Robutusen.

You know, the one at the beginning that sits across the street with a notebook. He ignores everyone and is constantly talking out loud to himself about story ideas and sentences he thinks of.

I pray I’m not that odd but quite often I feel like I am.

I have to keep telling myself this.

It’s been a semester and I still feel like I’m at camp.

$6.50 at Venice Antiques.

It’s a print. That still counts, right?

Also, I have no place to hang it.

The more I consider it the less cultured I feel by it.

…Still, it’s very pretty.

Why have I never watched Star Wars before?

Oh, yeah, because I’m obsessive and have to watch them in order and Spike always starts the marathon while I am busy.

Only now I have Netflix. Two Episodes down, four to go. 

At the moment I am despising the speed of the U.S. Postal Service.

I slacked on this so it’s kind of late.

1. Graduation

2. College

3. Aliens (Lysssor, Doctor Who, Ancient Aliens)

4. 4.0 (No big deal)

5. Texas (The Alamo, David Crockett, Galveston)

6. Omaha (I now live in the city.)

7. Horses (The Equestrian Club has reintroduced me to my childhood love of horses.)

8. Nonfiction (Blink, A World on Fire)

9. Fiction (On the Road, Tell All)

10. Wisdom teeth (I did not handle that well.)

11. First track medal (and 7th in districts.)

12. Hermit crab (From Texas named David Crockett)

13. Living “alone” (Really, with 3 other girls… But no parents)

14. Buying groceries (see: Living “alone”)

15. Writing non-fiction (For class: autobiography, English, speech)

16. Writing fiction (Lysssor, No Second Chances in Hell)

17. Doctor Who (David Tennant because I’m still behind… Watching on Netflix.)

18. Bucket list (Adding more than crossing off)

19. Pandora (boring music year for me)

20. Van Gogh (my iPod background is classy)

21. Flat tire (first car problem)

22. Fitness club (I love having a gym 2 blocks away)

23. Hockey (new favorite sport)

24. Elementary Students (Working at an elementary school)

25. Subway (Work)

25. Vomit (January 1, 2011 and December 31, 2011)

1. Waking up in strange beds to very strange noises. (Not as fun as it sounds)
2. Gone with the Wind (Half the movie last year, half this year)
3. Star Wars (Resolution: watch all episodes in order )
4. Work (Subway)
5. More Star Wars.

I think it’s going to be a good year.

I am a bit disappointed in the movie adaptation of A Picture of Dorian Gray that I have recently seen. This particular movie seemed to paint (no pun intended) Dorian as the main character of the story. Maybe it changes farther along in the book, but so far, I have seen a very different focus directed by Oscar Wilde. Lord Harry Henry stood out instantly as the intended focal point. He shows the obvious signs of a main character: narration follows him, when something happens to others the audience hears of it when Harry does, and he is the convening point for other characters. The more important reason Lord Henry stands out is by what he seems to represent. Harry places the idea of aging into Dorian’s head and continually explains to him views of the outside world that Dorian had once been sheltered from. These lessons offered by Lord Henry seem to place him in a metaphorical position of representing “society” as a whole.  Making him, the influencer, much more important than Dorian, the one being influenced.

This is what I do in my spare time.

It is possible to be intelligent without being pretentious.

Cold tea > cold coffee

but < every other cold drink